Greetings, boils and ghouls! I’m channeling the man of your screams — The Cryptkeeper — for this week’s Roundup, as an exorcise in truly terrible puns. Nothing inspiders more terror than awkward wordplay that requires far too much effort on my part, but I’m going to give it a try until I get the fang of it…or spontaneously combust from the awfulness. Strap yourselves in, kiddos — it’s going to be a bumpy ride! HYAAAA HA HA HA HA HAHAHA!!!
Monday
Our special guest is frighter F.T. Lukens, author of the newly released Monster of the Week, available now from Duet Books! What fiendish delights await you from this week’s My Favorite Things? How about modern imaginings of myth and folklore, a once and future king, local legends of North America, and the funniest comedy on your TV scream today! Intrigued? Find out more here.
Tuesday
Calie summons you to the bloody chamber for another bewitching episode of Changing the Map, a geographical exploration of the genres of fantasy. This time we’re entering the domain of Faery, discussing its earlier recorded beginnings with Giambattista Basile, Charles Perrault and others, all the way up to Neil Gaiman and the enormous contributions of Angela Carter, who is the focus of this post. We’re all about the feary tales here. Take a look!
Wednesday
Erin offers tricks and treats — a Halloween smorgasbord to get you in the spirit of the season, from a dastardly dreaming killer to a classic 80s children’s film that’s over the rainbow (and a cult hit for creepiness), to some upper-crust candy and a trio of witches who’ll Put a Spell on You! There’s lot’s to enjoy here — take a bite!
We’ve also got a guest post from author Brandon Getz honoring his debut novel, Lars Breaxface: Werewolf in Space, out now from Spaceboy Books! We’re talking You’re My Inspiration, where Getz discusses “those special and sometimes dark things that spark ideas and result in great stories.” What went into Getz’s throwback to grindhouse science fiction? How about Skywalkers and Star-Lords, B-movie horror and historical legends, a bit of Miéville, and the art of the remix! Blast off here for more!
Thursday
Kelly reviews Alma Katsu’s The Hunger, a horror reimagining of the historic and tragic Donner Party, infamously known for resorting to cannibalism to survive the unforgiving winter near the Sierra Nevada mountains. Of their party of 87, only 48 survived. As Kelly writes of The Hunger, “Cannibalism wasn’t scary enough,” so how does Katsu’s supernatural spin on the tale fare? Read Kelly’s verdict here.
Friday
J.L. continues her 2019 Resolution to read all the works in Ilona Andrews’s Kate Daniels series. For this entry, we’re up to the ninth volume in the series, Magic Binds. In this offering, Kate Daniels and Beastlord Curran Lennart decide to tie the knot, but a Witch Oracle predicts the wedding will spell disaster and destruction for all of Atlanta. Is this union just as doomed as it sounds? Find out here!
The Kasturi/Files
It’s another week of our special October column from guest authors Sandra Kasturi and Gemma Files. Blend cinematic terror with book recs and shocktails (what about horror d’oeuvres? I took a brief breather from terrible puns just to bring back the worst for the end!) and you’ve got yourself a killer thriller tonight! Here’s what happened this week:
- October 13: Episode Lucky 13: What Lies Beneath featuring Robert Zemeckis’s What Lies Beneath + The Drowned Out Cocktail
- October 14: Episode 14: The Gift of The Gift featuring Sam Raimi’s The Gift + The Fortuneteller Cocktail
- October 15: Special Episode: Midseason Break featuring an episode recap of the Kasturi/Files
- October 16: Episodes 15 and 16: Spec Chic Smackdown! The Covenant versus The Craft featuring Renny Harlin’s The Covenant and Andrew Fleming’s The Craft + The Salem Witch Cocktail and The Bad Witch Cocktail
- October 17: Episode 17: The Uncanny of Us featuring Jordan Peele’s Us and Get Out + The Doppelgänger Cocktail
- October 18: Episode 18: Vampires Using Their Time Wisely featuring Jim Jarmusch’s Only Lovers Left Alive + The Vampire Kiss Martini
- October 19: Episode 19: The Devil’s In the Details featuring Alan Parker’s Angel’s Heart + The Devil’s Heart Cocktail
We hope you’ve been enjoying these delicious films, books, and drinks!
Whew. Puns are difficult! Even crafting terrible puns is difficult. I’m not the type of writer who is into this sort of turn of phrase, and as much as I love Tales from the Crypt and The Cryptkeeper, the wordplay in his opening and closing monologues always made me cringe. I tried my best to honor The Cryptkeeper for a fun, themed Roundup, but as you can see, I ran out of steam quickly. I only have more respect for writers now who can pull of this kind of phrasing. Jokes of all kinds take effort, I’m learning, and spinning that kind of cheesiness into a Roundup also takes quite a bit of work, too. Nonetheless, I hope you all got a bit of nostalgia from this post and enjoyed the fun-filled week we had this time around. We’ll see you again soon for more magic in October. Pleasant screams! Kyaaaaa ha ha ha ha ha haaaaaaaa!
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