My Favorite Things with Calie Voorhis

They might not be raindrops on roses or whiskers on kittens, but that doesn’t mean that we love them any less. Welcome back to My Favorite Things, the weekly column where we grab someone in speculative circles to gab about the greatest in geek. This week we sit down with author and Changing the Map tour guide Calie Voorhis. This week’s MFT is a unique one, dubbed “The Head Cold Edition.” So what does Calie love when she’s suffering from the crud? Spoiler alert: a witchy herbal tea, decorating islands, futuristic mysteries, a remash of Tolkien, and the inspiration for Wall-E. Curious? Read on for more!


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Like much of the world, I am currently infected with the dreaded head cold. There’s a Ceti Alpha V eel lodged somewhere in my sinuses, and I might resemble Thrakkorzog from Tick vs. The Uncommon Cold.

So, there I am, and I know some of you are also there, or will be there, so without further ado, here are my favorite things — the Head Cold Edition.

To start things off, if you’ve got a head cold, you’re supposed to hydrate. Drink warm fluids, like tea. Lots and lots of tea. I grew up in Boulder, CO, which is a city that knows new age tea (hello, Celestial Seasonings). My favorite Boulder head cold tea is from Rebecca’s, located off the Boulder Mall on Spruce St, a few blocks away from the Mork and Mindy house. Their Cold and Flu tea tastes like its been brewed by a coven of organic Boulder witches under a full moon. That is, it tastes herbal and vaguely of the earth, with a slight mint tinge. I have no medical studies to show that it works, but it certainly seems to help.

I can’t concentrate when I have a head cold. I’m not much of a gamer (Myst and Asheron’s Call being the last games I was heavily invested in) — except for Pearl’s Peril and June’s Journey. These are hidden object games and the modern equivalent of Highlight’s Magazine read in long ago doctor’s offices. Both games are set in the 1920’s (ish) and feature female protagonists journeying around the world, solving mysteries and having adventures. The plots are completely ludicrous in a fun head cold logical way, but mainly you just, well, find things. I find them soothing. Also, when you find enough things, you get to decorate your own island. The art work is quite well-done, and I enjoy that women play the leading roles.

My islands are rather lavish.

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Look, I have a whole area devoted to the circus.  You can find both Pearl’s Peril and June’s Journey via the App Store.

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I also can’t really read things (books/stories/poetry) that require too much thought. My comfort reading this week was J.D. Robb’s Dark In Death (Eve Dallas series, book 46). Wow. I’ve read 46 of these? But you know what? They’re a quite enjoyable mix of romance, mystery, and science fiction/futuristic elements. All of the books center around Lieutenant Eve Dallas, her sexy Irish husband Rourke (who I always imagine as Pierce Brosnan), and her sidekick New Age partner Peabody as they solve murders in a futuristic New York City. They’re fun, if a slight bit predictable, and have never failed to deliver for me. I enjoy the side characters as much as I enjoy the protagonist, who is a very kick-ass, smart, strong, woman.

Of course, no extended episode on the couch would be complete without television and film. While marooned, I started watching The Shannara Chronicles, based on Terry Brooks’ books. In his world, after an apocalyptic event, the races of elves, trolls, gnomes, and demons have arisen and walk alongside humans. The Ellcrys (one tree) was created by the elves to keep the demons at bay, and it is dying. An elven princess, human thief, and half-human elf are sent to help the tree be reborn.

This is perfect head cold watching. You can sneeze or blow your nose and not have to pause because if you are a fantasy junkie you can probably figure out the next line of dialog. (To be fair, Terry Brooks pretty much started this remashing of Tolkien and always did it quite well.). Also, this show is flat out gorgeous, enough so that you’ll forgive the characters whinging on about their complicated love life. WHICH IS NOT THAT COMPLICATED, seriously. Just go have a threesome and get back to saving the world, already.

The real gem, the pearl in the oyster of mucous this past week, is *batteries not included, available on Netflix. I missed this Steven Spielberg bit of perfection until now, probably because it came out in 1987, when I was heading for college and preoccupied with Anne Rice. The film stars Hume Cronyn and Jessica Tandy, an elderly couple trying to save their Brooklyn apartment building from 1980’s slash and burn development. A pair of miniature robots (intergalactic? Earth grown? Doesn’t matter) stumble upon the apartment building and a unique relationship develops between them and the denizens. The evil is truly human, the protagonists are elderly, there’s a nice parity of casting. It’s a love story about friendships of all sorts, and is very eighties — not in a “oh this is so quaint and retro cool” but in the “eighties really sucked, people were dying of AIDS, and old buildings were being razed for bullshit development” type way — that is to say, as one who lived that heinous decade — realistic, other than, well, delightful robot flying saucers thingies. This film absolutely has to have inspired Wall-E. A charming delightful concoction, perfect for couch wallowing while your sinuses drain from crying, which you can always blame on the head cold if you’re a shy macho-cryer type.

So hey, I really hope none of you reading this have the grunge. If you do, hydrate, plop yourself on the couch, and get some rest, okay? And let me know what you watch/read/play during the ick, just in case it strikes again?


Calie Voorhis is a life-long fanatic of the fantastic, and internationally published short story writer and poet, with work in the anthologies Anywhere But Earth, D.O.A. Tales of Extreme Terror (Volumes I and II), Specter Spectacular, and the Urban Green Man Anthology, among others. She holds a BS in Biology from UNC-Chapel Hill, an MFA in Writing Popular Fiction from Seton Hill University, and is an Odyssey workshop alumna.

You can find her on Facebook and https://calievoorhis.com

4 Comments

  • Weasel of Doom March 12, 2018 at 8:32 am

    Oh god, I miss playing Asheron’s Call so much! And how does Nora Roberts manage to keep the “In Death” books so enjoyable for over 40 installments is a mystery of it’s own, but I am very glad she does 🙂

    Reply
  • Lane Robins March 12, 2018 at 4:57 pm

    Feel better! I love that you have a whole array of Favorite Things for Head Colds. That’s so true! And how I fell in love with Teen Wolf. Lying on my sickbed for a week, season one loaded on my computer, my brain firmly pushed offline by a tidal flood of mucus.

    Reply
  • Kelly McCarty March 12, 2018 at 11:56 pm

    I’m trying hard to remember if I’ve ever seen *batteries not included because it sounds so familiar. Your description makes me want to see it again or possibly for the first time.

    Reply
  • J.L. Gribble March 13, 2018 at 11:03 am

    I also play Pearl’s Peril and June’s Journey!! You should also try out Seeker’s Notes: Hidden Mystery.

    Reply

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